yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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