Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
