I must be too annoying 4 u.
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize