Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
