Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
