Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
