I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
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