whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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