the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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