Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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