Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
sick fucks of a feather flock together
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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