Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
