Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
