Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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