He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
