I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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