By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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