Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
