will power is for people who don't want to get laid
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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