What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
The feeling are messing with the penis
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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