If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
