so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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