we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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