I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
