We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
