from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
