His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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