You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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