after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
