i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
