Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
