your parents love me but you hate me
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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