just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
