I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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