one two three fourrrrnication!
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
