Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Randomize
