just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
