So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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