I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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