so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
