Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
oh god the rape fog is back!
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
