and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You had me at "let me see your balls"
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
