I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
