this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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