Did you just see the Batmobile???
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
