I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
