Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
