saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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