We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
