remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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